Syrian Chemical Weapon Crisis Our party stands to say that the chemical weapons should be removed from Syria and taken in an effort for a military strike on Narnia. There, talking witches and lions use magic on their own people. We find that this is a horrible travesty that must and will be stopped.
Organ Donation 18 people die every day waiting for organ donations and thousands are on the waiting list. Our party challenges everyone to be an organ donor or to give up an organ for someone else who would die without it. Not only does our party fully embrace this philosophy but so does our headrunner Vermin Supreme who, in 2012, gave one of his kidneys to his ailing mother.
Dental Hygiene Globally about 30% of people ages 65-74 have no natural teeth remaining. In the US this statistic is higher. Dental hygiene is poor among US residents and action must be taken to combat this. We promote mandatory toothbrushing laws for a strong healthy America that can bite back.
Unemployment Today unemployment is at about 6% with about 9 million people without work. This unemployment rate eats into our fiscal year's budget. The Free Pony Party promotes job creation by giving all Americans a free pony. This creates jobs for manure cleanups, pony healthcare, methane gas energy conversion, and many other related jobs.
Foreign Oil Dependence Oil dependence is considered an issue in America that is slowly being solved. This dependence on foreign oil is harmful to the American economy and keeps jobs out of the nation. With the free pony promise and harnessing the power of zombie turbines we hope to accelerate this process, create jobs, and lose all dependence on foreign oil. America then can use our these processes to produce energy and exports.
Zombie Apocalypse Many are aware of an incoming zombie apocalypse. With this tragedy many lives would be both lost and reanimated as the walking dead. This pandemic would also break apart the roots of society and governmental functions. The Free Pony Party promises to keep society moving forward and happy with the energy made by harnessing the awesome power of zombies in giant turbines. Our people are working on these turbines that zombies would turn in pursuit of the brains dangled in front of them.