Our party has 4 main goals to which we strive to achieve in the 2016 election:
A Free Pony for every American
To fund Time Travel Research
The Free Pony Promise Our parties Free Pony Promise was not only created to fulfill the dreams of all Americans but to help solve the issues of unemployment and the US's growing dependence on foreign oil. Thousands of jobs will be created with the maintenance and care that all of the ponies will need resulting in the start of a Pony based economy.
Time Travel Research Funding To the average American time travel research is a fantasy with no legitimate use thus they see no reason to fund it. The Free Pony Party, however, has seen the potential that this avenue of science can achieve. Our party sees time travel as a way to right the wrongs of the past in the form of Adolf Hitler. With the success of time travel our head runner, Vermin Supreme, plans on going back in time to kill baby Hitler with his bare hands to save millions of people the devastation and pain he will cause
Mandatory Tooth brushing Gingivitis has been eroding the gum line of this great nation long enough, it must be stopped. For too long this country has been suffering a great moral and oral decay – in spirit and incisors. A country’s future depends on its ability to bite back. We can no longer be a nation indentured. Our very salivation is at stake. We, the Pony Party, fully intend to bite back at the troubling issue of gingivitis that has been eroding the gum line of our great nation by enacting Mandatory Tooth Brushing Laws.
Zombie Preparedness Many have proven that the Zombie Apocalypse is coming and no party other than the Free Pony Party is addressing this truly fear inspiring issue. Our party fully intends to not only protect all people and ponies from this threat but to harness the awesome power of the zombies as well. We have been working on creating giant turbines to which we will lure zombies into by dangling brains in the center of the turbines. We will then, close the zombies into the turbines who will, in turn, power it whilst they are chasing after the brains.